The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund Bourne,
Ph.D.
With anxiety so pervasive, this book is the perfect adjunct to
therapy. Virtually every client that has used this book has noted
its simple and effective techniques. This comprehensive book addresses
all kinds of anxieties and is a tremendous resource.
The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns, M.D.
This is the first book I recommend to clients who are battling
depression. The main focus of the book is identifying and exposing
thought distortions, largely believed to lead to depressive moods.
Clients note that this book is also easy to use and understand.
Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom
Deviating from my first two more technical titles, I personally
found this book to be life changing. A non-fiction read, this
book is about a grown man who goes back to interview his beloved
dying college professor. A question I often ask in therapy is,
"Let's pretend you're 70-years-old, and we happen to cross
paths again. Tell me about your life. Are you content and satisfied
with how you lived it? What changes can we make in the here-and-now
to ensure that you can answer that question satisfactorily when
you are 70?" This powerful book can help lead the way through
the eyes of a man reflecting on his life.
The Gift of Peace by Joseph Cardinal Bernadin
The late archbishop of Chicago penned this book during his battle
with cancer. In a society where we are so life affirming and death
denying, this book can help provide peace for someone who is facing
end-of-life issues or is struggling with a loved ones death.
The author is a Catholic bishop and the book is clearly influenced
by that, but most readers can learn many things from this man's
journey toward death.
I Dont Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret
Legacy of Male Depression by Terrence Real.
Real addresses the innate sense so many men carry that depression
is a sign of weakness and defeat. He posits that men are socialized
to sublimate an inner sense of worthlessness in over work, alcoholism,
abuse, rage, and avoidance of intimacy by keeping others at a
distance. He suggests the cycle of depression is passed on to
mens children by sharing their pain with them. He suggests
a hopeful path of recovery and reclaiming of ones authentic
self by identifying the original pain or loss, entering into the
feelings of pain with a competent therapist, learning to take
steps into authentic intimacy that begin with acceptance of ones
self. Reals down-to-earth and common sense approach serves
to de-mystify the cloud of fear that often over shadows mental
health issues in men. As a man
myself, I was readily able to identify with his descriptions of
loss and common reactions he describes. Its a helpful tool
for men who seem to get hung up about seeking therapy by helping
them understand that feelings of darkness are common and widespread
among men while rarely discussed openly.
Getting the Love You Want by Harville Hendrix.
Getting the Love You Want is a helpful tool for couples seeking
to rebuild their relationship following pain and hurt, but is
also very applicable for those who seek to simply move past a
rut where they have begun to take each other for granted. Hendrix
approach is well grounded in family history as the basis for teaching
us how to be men and women, how to relate with each other, how
to be parents and more. He understands family history as the facet
that defines our perspective of normal. Hendrix provides
many exercises and tools for couples that help them understand
their partners history and framework for normal. By growing
in this awareness, Hendrix leads us to understand our partners
better, to anticipate their needs and desires, and to relate better.
He also provides material for couples to plan a new kind of normal
together as they move into the future. This book is a resource
I often comment to couples for ongoing maintenance of their relationship
after therapy ends.
How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids
Will Talk.
by Adele Faber & Elaine Mazlish
Although this book has been in print for many years, the concepts
outlined by the authors are still relevant and sound. Using many
practical, real life examples, Faber and Mazlish teach
parents to validate and empathize with their children. These simple
techniques can go far toward ending the cycle of obstinacy that
parents often experience with their children.
Food and Mood: The Complete Guide to Eating Well
and Feeling Your Best.
by Elizabeth Somer, M.A., R.D.
We have probably all noticed that what we eat affects everything
from our energy level to our mood. Yet, it can be difficult to
distill mountains of complex scientific data in an attempt to
discover what changes we might make that will yield positive results.
Somer has summarized scientific literature from over 2000 studies
in an attempt to offer practical, comprehensible information about
diet and health. This book includes practical tips for choosing
nutrients that will improve your memory, energy level, sleep patterns,
weight management and mood.
Reconcilable Differences
by Andrew Christensen, PhD and Neil S. Jacobson, PhD
This is a well-written, easy to read book for couples. It helps
readers understand why they have the same fights over and over,
and guides them through exercises which can assist them in quickly
defusing arguments, accepting differences, respecting each others
emotional needs and identifying what can and cannot be changed
in each person.
Continuing Bonds: New Understandings of Grief
by Dennis Klass, Phyllis R. Silverman, and Steven L. Nickman,
Ed.
We often assume that the function of grief is to get over
our loss; to cut emotional ties with the deceased and move on
with our lives. The authors research reveals that this approach
is based more on cultural values than upon what actually occurs.
In exploring individual experiences and grieving rituals from
other cultures, the authors offer opportunities for readers to
examine ways of grieving which honor and incorporate the relationship
they had/have with the deceased. While not a light read,
this is well worth it if you or a loved one are attempting to
navigate your own grieving process.
"Why Marriages Succeed or Fail...And How You Can Make
Yours Last" by John Gottman, Ph.D.
Marriage is not a game of chance. There are very specific actions
we can
take to avoid divorce and enhance the quality of our marital relationships.
Psychologist John Gottman has devoted decades to studying what
makes a
marriage last. Dr. Gottman identifies attitudes which doom a marriage
and
provides a wealth of helpful information that can help you take
concrete
steps to improve your marriage.
"Markings on the Windowsill; A Book About Grief That's
Really About Hope"
by Ronald Greer
Rev. Greer is a Pastoral Counselor and Marriage and Family therapist
whose two-year-old son was killed in an auto accident. Many years
later, Greer wrote this book, which chronicles his slow path toward
healing and shares insights about how he and his family found
ways to make meaning out of tragedy, strengthen their faith and
offer support to others as a result of their loss.
"Solitude: A Return to the Self"
by Anthony Storr, M.D.
Storr is a psychiatrist who writes about the fundamental human
need to find time for solitude. Storr suggests that solitude offers
us the opportunity to heal, discover and express creativity, commune
with a higher power and connect with our deepest selves. Although
more clinical than other books on our reading list, this is worth
wading through if the topic is of interest to you.
"Rituals For Our Times: Celebrating, Healing, and
Changing Our Lives and Our Relationships" by Evan Imber-Black, Ph.D., and Janine Roberts, Ed.D.
Imber-Black and Roberts are Family Therapists and Educators who
specialize in exploring the role of rituals in the life of a family.
They suggest that rituals are the catalyst for bringing families
closer together, making meaning of their experiences and forging
deeper emotional bonds. Rituals can be as simple as sharing a
meal or as complex as designing a ritual to help bring a blended
family together. Imber-Black and Roberts offer many stories and
examples that can help their readers better incorporate rituals
into their daily lives.
"Inner Work: Using Dreams & Active Imagination
For Personal Growth"
by Robert A. Johnson
Johnson is a Jungian analyst who writes about the inner world
of our dreams and imagination in a way that is easily understood.
Johnson believes that being in touch with this hidden depth within
ourselves can provide greater clues about who we are, who we long
to become and strengths we can call upon to continue our quest
toward personal growth and transformation. He outlines ways to
explore and analyze our dreams and the "material" that
surfaces when we allow our imaginations to become active.
"I'm Grieving As Fast As I Can: How Young Widows and
Widowers Can Cope and Heal." by Linda Feinberg, MSW, LCSW
Feinberg is a psychotherapist who specializes in grief counseling.
Through her work and research, she discovered that the experiences
of young widows/widowers were markedly different than those of
much older persons. Using many vignettes from her own work with
widows/widowers, she offers the reader valuable insights and helpful
suggestions for navigating this difficult transition. This is
a helpful, hopeful book for people going through this experience.
Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls,
by Mary Pipher, PhD.
"At adolescence, says Mary Pipher, "girls become 'female
impersonators' who fit their whole selves into small, crowded
spaces." Many lose spark, interest, and even IQ points as
a "girl-poisoning" society forces a choice between being
shunned for staying true to oneself and struggling to stay within
a narrow definition of female. Pipher's alarming tales of a generation
swamped by pain may be partly informed by her role as a therapist
who sees troubled children and teens, but her sketch of a tougher,
more menacing world for girls often hits the mark. She offers
some prescriptions for changing society and helping girls resist."
(Amazon.com review)
Parenting With Love and Logic, by Foster W. Cline
& Jim Fay.
"Psychiatrist Cline and educator Fay's "Love and Logic"
parenting method advocates raising responsible children through
practice. "Helicopter" parents hover around their children
while "drill sergeant" parents give orders to theirs,
they claim. Neither of these styles permits children to learn
how to make choices and learn from the consequences. The result
is that as early as adolescence these children too often make
bad decisions. In the context of a healthy, loving relationship,
"Love and Logic" parents teach their children responsibility
and the logic of life by solving their own problems, providing
skills for coping in the real world. After laying out the principles
of "Love and Logic," the authors provide "parenting
pearls," which are strategies for applying the method to
actual situations such as back-seat battles in the car, homework,
and keeping bedrooms clean. The narration, performed by Tim
Kenney and Bert Gurule, is clear and energetic. This is an upbeat
and sensible approach to child rearing that will be popular in
public libraries." -Nann Blaine Hilyard, Fargo P.L., N.D.
Shelter of Each Other, by Mary Pipher, PhD.
"As she tells stories of families her own and others, therapist
Pipher (Reviving Ophelia) focuses on small victories in what she
calls "the current family-hurting culture." Distancing
herself from therapies that pathologize families, Pipher claims
to have experienced the power of hope that can be stimulated through
carefully chosen family stories. In even the most dysfunctional
families, she discerns threads of connectedness that have led
to empowerment of her clients as they became more capable of handling
their own lives. Pipher recommends an empathetic approach to families'
efforts to survive in a difficult era, one that parallels the
homesteading years of her grandparents earlier in this century.
She offers plain and practical talk for beleaguered parents and
the families they are trying to protect." (From Publisher's
Weekly/Amazon.com)
Learned Optimism: How to Change Your Mind and Your Life
by Martin E.P. Seligman PhD
The author helps the reader to challenge pessimistic, negative,
and depressive thinking patterns and to replace them with positive
thinking patterns; the result is experiencing an optimistic outlook
and improved mood.
Clear Your Past, Change Your Future: Proven Techniques
for Inner Exploration and Healing by Lynne D. Finney,
J.D., M.S.W.
This book guides the reader by identifying past hurts that affect
the present, changing maladaptive thought and behavior patterns,
and creating a vision for ones future. It also discusses
the joy and importance of living in the present moment and inner-transformation.
The Self-Forgiveness Handbook: A Practical and Empowering
Guide by Thom Rudledge, LCSW
The reader will learn to challenge unhealthy belief patterns,
forgiving self, and developing personal responsibility, awareness
and compassion. This book discusses the importance of relationship
with self.
Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning
This is a very thorough look at the issue of low self-esteem which
is often a piece of the depression and anxiety our clients experience.
It talks about ways to disarm your inner critic, cognitive distortions
that perpetuate low self-esteem, how to develop self-esteem in
children and many other issues around self-esteem. I believe there
is a companion workbook that can also be used to do exercises
around self-esteem.
After the Affair by Janis Abrahms Spring
I think this is an excellent book to recommend to couples struggling
to restore their relationship after an affair. The thing I like
most about it is that it looks at the issue from both points of
view - from the point of view of the person that cheated and from
the point of view of the person that was cheated on. Couples I
have recommended it to have found it very helpful in helping them
try and understand the other person's point of view.
Lifemates: The Love Fitness Program for a Lasting Relationship
by Harold Bloomfield and Sirah Vettese
This book has many good exercises for couples to use to revitalize
their relationship. I especially like the Heart Talks"
that encourage deeper and deeper levels of sharing for the couple.
The Seven Principles for Making a Marriage Work
by John Gottman and Nan Silver
John Gottman has done a lot of scientifically-verifiable work
on the characteristics of relationships that work and relationships
that don't work. He gives very practical advice on things to incorporate
into your relationship to make it stronger. He also discusses
very clear things to avoid which are often red flags for problems
down the road.
I Hate You - Don't Leave Me Understanding Borderline Personality
by Jerold Kreisman
For anyone working with or in a relationship with someone with
borderline personality disorder, this does a good job of helping
you understand the person. It also offers help with learning how
to cope with them and their violent mood swings, chronic depression
and self-destructive tendencies.
Mindfulness in Plain English by Bhante H. Gunaratana
"This one seemed to have the best reviews and I like the
apparent simple approach to describing mindfulness."
Mindfulness for Beginners by Jon Kabat-Zinn
"I liked that this was available digitally so that I can
take advantage of the drive for work."
A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose by
Eckhart Tolle. Building on the astonishing success of The
Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle presents readers with an honest look
at the current state of humanity: He implores us to see and accept
that this state, which is based on an erroneous identification
with the egoic mind, is one of dangerous insanity. Tolle tells
us there is good news, however. There is an alternative to this
potentially dire situation. Humanity now, perhaps more than in
any previous time, has an opportunity to create a new, saner,
more loving world. This will involve a radical inner leap from
the current egoic consciousness to an entirely new one. In illuminating
the nature of this shift in consciousness, Tolle describes in
detail how our current ego-based state of consciousness operates.
Then gently, and in very practical terms, he leads us into this
new consciousness. We will come to experience who we truly arewhich
is something infinitely greater than anything we currently think
we areand learn to live and breathe freely (Amazon.com
description).
How To Win as a Step-Family by Emily Visher PhD
and John Visher MD
For all blended families I work with, I highly recommended this
book. Personally, it helped me as I adjusted to my new family.
It normalizes the adjustment period families need to go through
and is easy to understand. Great book!!!
You Can Be Happy No Matter What: Five Principles for Keeping
Life In Perspective by Richard Carlson, PhD
This is my most recent best book recommendation. It looks at how
changing a person's thoughts and thinking can improve his/her
outlook in life and build contentment. An easy to read book.
Fighting for Your Marriage by Howard J Markman, Scott
M. Stanley, and Susan L. Blumberg. This book is based on groundbreaking
studies that reveal strategies to help handle conflict more constructively,
protect happiness and reduce the odds of breaking up.
The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Dr. Gary
Chapman reveals how different people express love in different
ways. These love languages include: Quality time, words of affirmation,
gifts, acts of service and physical touch.
Honeymoon Marriage by Darren and Donna McNees.
Success in any area of life can be obtained by following a detailed
road map written by someone who knows how to get there. "Honeymoon
Marriage" is such a road map. It will guide you down the
path to self-improvement, optimal health, financial prosperity,
self-discovery, spiritual enlightenment, self-confidence, romance
and intimacy.
Clinical
Psychology Associates
State Certified Clinic
262.251.1112