“The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity” |
Nadine Burke Harris, M.D. |
In 1998, a landmark study was published, identifying 10 ‘adverse childhood experiences’ (ACE’s) that negatively affect both brain and biological development. More recently, pediatrician Nadine Burke-Harris has synthesized decades of research on this issue, concluding that people with ‘ACE scores’ have a significantly higher risk of mental disorders or related difficulties that negatively affect day-to-day functioning. What was surprising to the psychological and medical communities, however, has been her discovery that, even accounting for lifestyle factors that people with ACE scores are susceptible to (smoking, alcohol/drug abuse, poor diet), people who have experienced ACE’s are at a much higher risk of developing inflammatory diseases (e.g., asthma, heart disease), autoimmune disorders, and other serious health problems. They are also more likely to die prematurely. One goal held by Dr. Burke Harris is to have medical professionals who work with patients, mental health providers and educators administer ACE inventories to determine who within their population is at risk and would benefit from more intense interventions. If you are working with, raising or mentoring children who have experienced adverse childhood experiences, this is an invaluable tool. I recommend this book to my clients who have experienced adverse childhood experiences because it frees them from the cycle of blame they feel when their functioning is compromised, and offers them hope that they can begin the healing process. |
“Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life” |
Susan David, Ph.D. |
The path to wellbeing is not to sweep things under the rug, deny our feelings or act tough and impervious. It is to move into our experiences with curiosity, understand how they are affecting us, identify the negative narratives that may keep us stuck and discouraged, and begin facing our challenges with courage and self-compassion. Emotional agility does not protect us from pain and hardship, but it does enable us to navigate our inner world and the world around us more successfully. Psychologist Susan David has spent decades studying emotions, happiness and achievement, and has created a book that is both fascinating and useful. |
“You Are Not Your Pain: Using Mindfulness to Relieve Pain, Reduce Stress, and Restore Well-Being” |
Vidyamala Burch and Danny Penman |
This book is written two experts in the Mindfulness field who themselves have struggled with severe pain after sustaining serious injuries. This is an eight-week program that introduces the concept of Mindfulness and guides the reader (or listener, since it’s available on Audible) through meditations and other techniques that have been proven to be highly effective for those who suffer from pain and the chronic stress and distress this experience can cause. |
“Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” |
Kristin Neff, Ph.D. |
The mental health community got it wrong when we embraced the importance of self-esteem, and we are rapidly walking it back. Self-esteem is based on the premise that we are each special, even superior, and are thus worthy of admiration and praise. High self-esteem, in its unhealthiest form, has been linked to behaviors such as narcissism, bullying, exclusivity and a lack of empathy. As we are discovering, the key to building good relationships with self and others lies in self-compassion. Research in the field of self-compassion indicates that people who are compassionate toward their failings and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who repeatedly judge themselves. They are also better equipped to exercise compassion in their interactions with others. Psychologist Kristin Neff leads readers through both her theories and exercises that will help us build the capacity for greater self-compassion. |
“The Compassionate Mind,” |
Paul Gilbert |
Our minds have developed in a way that makes them highly sensitive to perceived threats. This fast-acting system can trigger anxiety, depression and aggression. This is an incredibly difficult and stressful way to exist. Psychologist Paul Gilbert uses groundbreaking research to illustrate how developing kindness and compassion for others can calm our ‘threat’ systems, help us learn to soothe ourselves and increase feelings of contentment and wellbeing. Gilbert guides readers through basic mind training exercises that can bring great benefit to our lives. |
“Braving the Wilderness” |
Brene Brown, Ph.D. |
If you would like to live your life in a more reflective way, there is no better author than Brene Brown. In this book, she addresses the pain of isolation and perfectionism and the erosion of civility and meaningful discourse that so many are experiencing in our culture. Brown offers both ideas to consider and spiritual practices that can help us better connect to ourselves and each other. |
“Prisoners of Our Thoughts” |
Alex Pattakos, Ph.D. and Elaine Dundon |
Drawing on the work of Viktor Frankl, renowned psychiatrist and holocaust survivor, psychologists Pattakos and Dundon outline 7 core principles for living an authentic and meaning-filled life, even in the midst of turmoil and tragedy. In a way that is never shallow or trite, they explore Frankl’s ideas about what it means to “choose our attitude” and how it is that we might live our lives in a more holistic and integrated way. |
“The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science” |
Norman Doidge, M.D. |
Scientists once thought the fully-developed adult brain was unchangeable. This has not turned out to be the case. The science of ‘neuroplasticity’ is demonstrating that our brains have the ability to change and “reorganize” throughout our lives. Developing new neural pathways enables us to change the ways we think, feel and respond, hence allowing us to become more adaptable. Neural plasticity helps us learn and grow, rather than becoming rigid or stagnant. This is a very engaging examination of how we create a ‘growth mindset’ that can transform our lives and alter the way we age. |
“The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom” |
Jonathan Haidt |
Jonathan Haidt is a brilliant and engaging Social Psychologist who combines ancient wisdom with scientific research to study how the mind works. Have you ever wondered why you have difficulty sticking to the plans you make? Have you wondered why all the activities or accomplishments you strive for don’t actually bring happiness? Have you ever wondered how to live a more meaningful life? Dr. Haidt delves into these topics and so much more in this book. If you don’t have time to read, check out YouTube, where you can find his TED talks and other lectures. He is both interesting and very humorous. |
“The War for Kindness: Building Empathy In A Fractured World” |
Jamil Zaki |
This book weaves science and stories together, examining why we struggle to understand people who aren’t like us, but find it easy to hate them. Research on the phenomenon of empathy has demonstrated that we are less caring than we were even 30 years ago – yet it doesn’t have to be this way. Empathy is not a fixed trait. We’re not either born with it or lacking it. It is a skill we can learn and strengthen over a lifetime. This book offers invaluable insights about how to develop and strengthen our capacity for empathy, and the tremendous benefits we will reap as a result. |
“The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma” |
Bessel Van der Kolk, M.D. |
Trauma is a fact of life. Most lives are touched trauma to some degree. This book explores the ways in which trauma literally reshapes both the body and brain, limiting the ability of survivors to experience pleasure, self-control, engagement and resilience. Dr. van der Kolk outlines innovative ways to find healing and live more satisfying, whole lives. |
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“Healing and the Mind” |
Bill Moyers |
In this companion volume to the PBS series, television journalist Bill Moyers explores the fascinating, complex, powerful connection between mind and body in human health. Ancient medical science told us our minds and bodies are one. So did philosophers of old. Now, modern science and new research are helping us to understand these connections. Moyers talks with physicians, scientists, therapists, and patients -- people who are taking a new look at the meaning of sickness and health – as he discusses their search for answers to perplexing questions: How do emotions translate into chemicals in our bodies? How do thoughts and feelings influence health? How can we collaborate with our bodies to encourage healing? This is a powerful book that could influence how you think about sickness and health. |
“The Mayo Clinic Handbook for Happiness: a 4-step plan for resilient living” |
Amit Sood, M.D. |
Dr. Sood is a specialist in stress and resiliency who has spent decades studying the factors that help people develop a greater sense of wellbeing. Based on neuroscience and psychology, this book offers a 10-week plan that can help readers reduce stress, anxiety and pain, and enable them to move toward an improved sense of strength and contentment. |
“Together: The Healing Power of Human Connection in a Sometimes Lonely World,” |
Vivek H Murthy, M.D. (Surgeon General of the United States) |
Even when surrounded by people, and bombarded by endless stimulation, humans can often still feel lonely. The hidden impact of loneliness is the negative effect it has upon our mental and physical health, as well as upon the healthy functioning of families, organizations and our society as a whole. Dr. Murthy highlights our desire to connect and form community, and shares strategies that will help us do so. We are truly better together! |
“The Book of Forgiving: The Fourfold Path for Healing Ourselves and Our World,” |
Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu |
A frequent topic in my therapy sessions is forgiveness: Should we forgive another? How do we do that in a meaningful way? What happens if we don’t/can’t/aren’t ready? The late Archbishop Tutu and his daughter, Rev. Mpho Tutu offer one of the most insightful books I’ve read on this topic. Their wisdom is well-earned, having been an instrumental part of the path toward reconciliation and forgiveness in South Africa. This book outlines four steps we can all take as we struggle to heal ourselves and repair relationships in our own lives. |
“The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World” |
His Holiness the Dalai Lama, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, with Douglas Abrams |
If you only read one book this year, this is the book I would recommend. It is one of those rare resources that I will read over and over because it contains too much wisdom and inspiration to grasp in one reading. (Or in one “hearing,” if you prefer the Audible version.) This book features a series of conversations between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu in what was the last face-to-face meeting of their lifetimes. Using the central message that you must have joy if you are to bring joy to others, these spiritual masters and Nobel Peace Prize winners offer a wealth of wisdom on how to live abundantly in the face of adversity, as well as insights about how to cultivate virtues such as humility, forgiveness, compassion, and generosity. They are wise, funny and utterly down-to-earth, creating a book that is as easy to read as it is enjoyable and inspiring. |
“Truth and Repair” |
Judith Lewis Herman, M.D. |
Psychiatrist Judith Herman is one of the most respected voices in the area of trauma – especially sexual violence. While our opinions are often shaped by anger and the desire for revenge, she notes the ways in which victims are often left without a voice, or without any recognition of the harm done to them. Only 20% of sexual violence acts are ever reported, and only 5% of those ever result in a conviction. Victims are either put on trial or rendered powerless by those who are trying to “save” them. In the process, WE fail to ask what THEY want, and what will help THEM heal. Dr. Herman brilliantly illustrates both the importance listening to survivors and asking them what they want. She also stresses the importance of creating a model for community accountability, and a process for helping victims find healing within the larger community, rather than perpetuating a system that renders victims voiceless and invisible. |
“How To Know a Person: The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen” |
David Brooks |
I do not make New Year’s Resolutions. They too often rely on impulsive wishes, and result in feeling inadequate when our goals are not perfectly met. Instead, I focus continually on personal growth goals. This book was the perfect start to my year, and one that I recommend to anyone who shares the same passion for growth. |