“A Last Goodbye,” by Elin Kelsey, artwork by Soyeon Kim
This is a beautifully written and illustrated book for children that can help guide them through the grief process, whether they are coping with the loss of a relative or…
Books
by therapist Martha Jackson Oppeneer, D.Min., LMFT.
In this section of our website, Martha selects insightful books covering important topics such as parenting, relationships, health, and well-being.
We are excited to introduce the latest selection below.
“A Last Goodbye”
by Elin Kelsey, artwork by Soyeon Kim
Summary:
This is a beautifully written and illustrated book for children that can help guide them through the grief process, whether they are coping with the loss of a relative or friend, or a companion animal. Using creatures from around the world and inspired by animal research that explores the myriad ways animals say goodbye to their own, this book takes the reader through an exploration of what their loss means and suggests ways to celebrate the person or animal that has died.
Previous Book Reviews
Children's Books
“The Big Cheese,” by Jori John & Pete Oswald
This is a delightful children’s book that is one in a series of seven books, each teaching important lessons in humorous and compelling ways. The Big Cheese is the best…
“Ruby Finds a Worry” by Tom Percival
This is a book for children – a powerful, beautifully-illustrated exploration of feelings. The main character, Ruby, “finds” a worry, notices how it grows from day to day, and learns…
“Goodnight Stories for Rebel Girls” by Elena Favilli and Francesca Cavallo
This was recommended by a client with two young girls, who is raising them to be strong and confident in a society that too often lacks healthy female role models…
“What Does It Mean to Be Present” by Rana DiOrio, illustrated by Eliza Wheeler
This is a delightful, well-illustrated children’s book that introduces kids to the concept of approaching activities mindfully: noticing when someone needs help, waiting patiently, learning to focus on what is…
“Breathe like a Bear: 30 Mindful Moments for Kids to Feel Calm and Focused Anytime, Anywhere” by Kira Willey
This is an ideal resource for parents/caregivers and kids to do together. Drawing from the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction discipline, this book offers mindful exercises and beautiful illustrations that will…
Parenting Books
“Taking Charge of ADHD: The Complete, Authoritative Guide for Parents” (Fourth Edition), by Russell Barkley, Ph.D.
Barkley guides his readers through the challenge of understanding why kids with ADHD act as they do, getting an accurate diagnosis, working with school and health care professionals to get…
“Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming The Parent You Want to Be,” By Dr. Becky Kennedy
Dr. Becky’s mission in life is to help parents connect with kids in a way that recognizes and builds upon their fundamental goodness. Her approach does not involve shaping kids…
“No Drama Discipline” by Dan Siegel, M.D. and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.
This title is available in a book as well as an accompanying workbook. If you only have time for the workbook, that will provide much of the information you need.…
“Bottom Line for Baby: From Sleep Training to Screens, Thumb Sucking to Tummy Time – What the Science Says” by Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.
Dr. Bryson is a Clinical Psychologist who specializes in the art and science of child raising. In this book, she addresses each issue using a three-step approach: an objective summary…
“Weird Parenting Wins: Bathtub Dining, Family Screams, and Other Hacks from the Parenting Trenches,” by Hillary Frank
Parenting expert Hillary Frank compiles hundreds of suggestions from parents in this helpfully entertaining book. While it does not offer a parenting road map, it will encourage you to be…
“Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain” by Daniel J. Siegel, M.D.
Dr. Siegel identifies 3 myths about adolescents that sabotage parenting styles and inhibit the positive growth experiences of adolescents: 1) Adolescents are immature; 2) Adolescent behavior can be explained by…
“How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success” by Julie Lythcott-Haims
Parents are stressed. Kids are stressed. Yet, we continue to encourage and support methods of parenting that are exhausting and unsustainable, and that do not adequately prepare children for adulthood.…
The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness
by Jonathan Haidt, Ph.D. This is a “must read” for parents, teachers and school administrators, mental health providers, and anyone else working with children and adolescents. Jon Haidt is a social…
“Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and you) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life” by Dr. Stuart Shanker.
Summary: There are no bad kids, there are only stressed-out kids. Dr. Shanker brings decades of neuroscience research together to help us better understand how to help our children (and…
“The Whole-Brain Child Workbook: practical exercises, worksheets and activities to nurture developing minds,” by Daniel Siegel, M.D., and Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D.
Summary: Based on their book of the same title, this is a practical workbook that helps parents understand their child’s developing mind and gain the tools they need to help…
Relationship Books
“Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” by Susan Johnson, Ph.D.
Summary: Susan Johnson is a renowned couples’ therapist who has created an approach that enjoys a remarkably high rate of success. In “Hold Me Tight,” Dr. Johnson teaches readers that…
“Will I Ever Be Free of You? How to Navigate a High-Conflict Divorce from a Narcissist and Heal Your Family” by Karyl McBride, Ph.D.
Summary: While this book should probably come with a cautionary note to avoid diagnosing another person – especially a spouse or ex-spouse – with narcissism, the author provides critically important…
“Eight Dates: Essential Conversations for a Lifetime of Love” by John Gottman, Ph.D., Julie Schwartz Gottman, Ph.D., Doug Abrams & Rachel Carlton Abrams, M.D.
Summary: Researcher and clinician, John Gottman, is widely regarded as a world expert on the topic of what makes relationships work. Teaming up with three other researchers, they have written…
“Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence” by Esther Perel, Ph.D.
Summary: Renowned psychologist and Certified Sex Therapist, Esther Perel, does a brilliant job of highlighting the tension between our desire for domesticity in marriage and our longing for excitement and…
Healing and Personal Growth books
“The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma” by Bessel Van der Kolk, M.D.
Trauma is a fact of life. Most lives are touched by trauma to some degree. This book explores the ways in which trauma literally reshapes both the body and brain,…
“The War for Kindness: Building Empathy In A Fractured World” by Jamil Zaki
This book weaves science and stories together, examining why we struggle to understand people who aren’t like us, but find it easy to hate them. Research on the phenomenon of…
“The Happiness Hypothesis: Finding Modern Truth in Ancient Wisdom” by Jonathan Haidt
Jonathan Haidt is a brilliant and engaging Social Psychologist who combines ancient wisdom with scientific research to study how the mind works. Have you ever wondered why you have difficulty…
“The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science” by Norman Doidge, M.D.
Scientists once thought the fully-developed adult brain was unchangeable. This has not turned out to be the case. The science of “neuroplasticity” is demonstrating that our brains have the ability…
“Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself” by Kristin Neff, Ph.D.
The mental health community got it wrong when we embraced the importance of self-esteem, and we are rapidly walking it back. Self-esteem is based on the premise that we are…
“You Are Not Your Pain: Using Mindfulness to Relieve Pain, Reduce Stress, and Restore Well- Being” by Vidyamala Burch and Danny Penman
This book is written by two experts in the Mindfulness field who themselves have struggled with severe pain after sustaining serious injuries. This is an eight-week program that introduces the…
“Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life” by Susan David, Ph.D.
The path to wellbeing is not to sweep things under the rug, deny our feelings or act tough and impervious. It is to move into our experiences with curiosity, understand…
“The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity” by Nadine Burke Harris, M.D.
In 1998, a landmark study was published, identifying 10 “adverse childhood experiences” (ACE’s) that negatively affect both brain and biological development. More recently, pediatrician Nadine Burke-Harris has synthesized decades of…
“The Compassionate Mind,” by Paul Gilbert
Summary: Our minds have developed in a way that makes them highly sensitive to perceived threats. This fast-acting system can trigger anxiety, depression and aggression. This is an incredibly difficult…
“Braving the Wilderness” by Brene Brown, Ph.D.
Summary: If you would like to live your life in a more reflective way, there is no better author than Brene Brown. In this book, she addresses the pain of…
Health & Miscellaneous
The Invisible Kingdom: Reimagining Chronic Illness,” by Meghan O’Rourke
How do you respond when you develop a devastating illness, but know you will never be able to present a “success story” (an account of triumphing over adversity and regaining…
“Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism,” by Barry M. Prizant, Ph.D
Summary: For anyone whose life has been touched by autism – whether through a family member, friend or coworker – this book offers a profound and compassionate glimpse into the…
“Why We Sleep: unlocking the power of sleep and dreams,” by Matthew Walker, Ph.D.
Summary: When I discovered this book, I was intimidated by the length (nearly 400 pages, or 14 hours of listening time on Audible), figuring it would be a snooze (sorry,…
“The Telomere Effect: A Revolutionary Approach to Living Younger, Healthier, Longer,” by Elizabeth Blackburn, PhD, and Elissa Epel, PhD.
Summary: This is a groundbreaking book coauthored by the Nobel Prize winner who discovered telomerase and telomeres’ role in the aging process, and a health psychologist who has done original…
“Secrets From The Eating Lab” by Traci Mann, Ph.D.
Summary: When it comes to nutrition and health, everyone is an expert. Unfortunately for us, most of the information shared is either misleading or wrong. Psychologist Traci Mann of the…
“Ultra-Processed People: The Science Behind Food That Isn’t Food,” by Chris van Tulleken, M.D., Ph.D.
Summary: I offer this book with the disclaimer that I am not a nutritionist, and have no training in nutrition science. But I vetted it carefully, and recommend it based upon…
Games and Activities
“Where Should We Begin? A game of stories,” by Esther Perel, Ph.D.
Psychologist Esther Perel has spent her career helping couples understand and energize the love they share. She is a prolific author and speaker, but now offers her insights in the…
“BE MINDFUL: Card Deck for Teens”
This is a deck of 50 laminated cards that offer suggestions for living more mindfully; worrying less about the past or the future and learning to live in the present…
Talking Point: 200 conversation cards (available for kids, teens and families), created by Ben Jones
What is happening to our relationships? This is a frequently-asked question as we all become increasingly buried in various forms of technology. Our wellbeing is profoundly connected to our ability…
“Bright Spots Thoughts and Feelings: A Sentence Completion Card Game,” by Elizabeth Wornham
The creator of this game (suitable for ages 5 and up) is a Marriage & Family Therapist with expertise in play therapy. “Bright Spots” helps parents, teachers and mental health professionals…
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